foto blog

started a new blog on a whim.
http://corazonio.spaces.live.com

In me.

Felt as if i wasted 2 yrs of my life.. Served me right for thinking abt everything except putting my effort in studying when i ought to. now have to suffer the regret.fear.confusion.uncertainty of "What if i didnt make it?"

while everyone is askin me wad do i plan to do next time?
everytime i ans one of this, i feel an inward cringe of as if lying thru my teeth..like im lying to myself.to them that actually im one of ose who studied real shit n got thru d A's..on my way to the Uni.. seem all bright n shiny.

but deep down, it darkens this bit more to the vortex of uncertainty.
knowing that you didnt try your best.
feeling as if you are looking from outside, into this pathetic existence.---you.

Cant fully enjoy the hols cos there is always this naggin feelin that all these are the calmness before the storm. before the music that is to be faced.

True, no point brooding over split milk. But, there is always the "But".

I need to get away and have a holiday.
To sort myself out.

dec

woosh! the year's almost over.
think that the past 2 yrs in PJ flashed by, n all i could ( or rather, WANT to) remember was the 1st 3 months of orientation. how misleading it was. siggh.....whale of emotional roller coaster towards the end of it.. the tears... the self-imposed solitaire.. the heart-to-heart buddy who was there to lend a shoulder to cry on, a ear to listen n the mind to calm my crazy soul down. aint i glad that i found such a fren.. there was CY who was nv fails to console me n my toopid crushes i had.. n now Dino who was such a great pal. :)

im jus glad that i have frens liddat ard.

y am i gettin so emotional again?
gosh, i soooo neeed a dose of endorphins.. pls let me drag my lazy arse up tml morning for my long forsaken Sat morning run..